Pictures!!

Sorry for the somewhat crazy blog I last posted...But it really is a taste of life here. some days are the best in uour life and some are the worst. Its a whirl wind of emotions!!! But lately I have been having amazing days and I want to show you all some pictures to prove it!!! I am also going to my site on Sunday and it will be my home away from home for the next 2 years!!! I am very terrified to say the least. But Let the adventure begin!!!

well

I’m falling backwards. -Down a cliff- I see images of everything normal flashing by my sides as I quickly fall. I focus solely on my hands in front of my face frantically grabbing for something to hold onto. Something normal to soften the fall.

This week I became a new person and It’s terrifying.

A glimpse:
This week was our “site visit”. We were going to see where we’d be working and living for the next two years. A week of complete Spanish and Quiche. A week in the mountains with corn fields hovering over me. Cows mooing, Goats in the front yard, sheep roaming the hills and baby piglets wandering in the grass. Rain and 6 blankets to sleep at night. A room with two entries and no doors. No shower. Lots of coffee and lots of smiling faces. A feeling of confidence, independence, complete lack of control, and a will to let the wind take me where I’m supposed to be.
On the last day I decide to go back to the main city by myself and spend the night. I had been planning on this for quite some time and I decided I would be ok. I could do it. I say goodbye to my new family and I get on a microbus, roll through the mountains and arrive in the city. I begin asking people how to get to the central park. A kind man tells me I have to cross the road. I ask another man and he tells me to the left. I am now in the market. It’s market day in the second biggest city of Guatemala. I ask a woman and her three kids how to get to the park and she completely ignores me. It’s at this point I begin to breathe a bit heavier. I turn around and am surrounded by taxi drivers whistling at me and asking if I need a ride. I remind myself this would not be a good or appropriate time to start crying.
I had to pee sooo bad, I was scared, I was lonely, I was tired, I was shocked. I remembered the Peace Corps telling me to take things one thing at a time. Take a second and look at a situation then brainstorm on tangible things you can do to make your situation a bit better. I see a bathroom and even though I have to pay, she didn’t give me toilet paper and it was disgusting it took care of one necessary problem.
As I begin walking again I pull out a chocolate cookie that I was saving just for this kind of occasion. I then begin talking out loud to myself for two reasons. One, to hear English and two, because I need to talk myself through tough situations. I count on my right hand all the shitty things about the situation. One, Im alone. Two, I have no clue where to go. Three, I have no clue how to get to where I want to go. Four, I am terrified to spend the night alone. Five, I have no plan…….Then on my left hand I count out loud on each finger the good things about the situation. One, I have always wanted to travel alone. Two, I am very independent. Three, This is the Peace Corps life I always wanted. Four, I’m always going to remember this day. Five, Im proud of myself. And I couldn’t have it equal the number of the bad so I added six, Just breathe and everything will work out.
I’m finally on the main road and I’ve decided I might as well walk the hour to the park instead of take a bus since I have all day to spare. My confidence is up and I have a plan! To walk somewhere!!! Yay….then a truck full of men drive by with their heads sticking out the window…whistling at me. I don’t know what took over me but I flip them off and yell “F You!!!”
OH MY GOD! They are going to turn around and kill me! I run across the street and disguise myself in the crowd. They don’t turn around and I’m embarrassed. I’m that Peace Corps volunteer they talk about. The one who lets things build up and then freaks out!
I cup my hand around my box necklace. Inside it contain an encouraging note I wrote to myself for times like this. I hold onto it as if it’s my life and my sanity. And in many ways it was both, inside the little box around my neck.
I walk and walk and walk and find the first hotel! And it’s only a block away from the park!!!! Also my friends called from Huehuetenango and said they were coming to stay with me!!!!! I get a room with 4 beds….and things are looking up. I take a hot shower and I chat with the hotel lady who wont leave me alone. Now, for some food. I walk about another 40 minutes until I find a tacos al pastor place!!! Yay things are really looking up. But I wish everyone would stop starring at me. I’ve never eaten alone at a restaurant before and I’m reminded of many romantic comedies where everyone feels bad for the girl alone at the table. I ate 3 fantastic tacos and was pleasantly reminded of Mexico.
Then I buy a powered vanilla cookie and search for an internet café. I open my mail and have received a very mean and un-welcomed letter from someone I care deeply about. In a hasty response I say some mean things and I leave the café. My feeling of “it will be ok” has vanished. I am no longer who I was and I am no longer in a world I know. I think of my parents and how they are a world away from me. Im walking on the streets of Guatemala crying. People are starring. I have to go use the bathroom in my hotel two times because I have made myself sick to my stomach. I go to the park to eat my cookie but a band is playing beautiful music and I’m swept away and feel as though I should be in a love story movie. But I’m not. I call my mom and tell her to call me right back. She doesn’t. They don’t know how to call me from Ireland. I don’t have enough minutes to talk to her on my phone. I think of her across the world in Ireland trying to dial my number and wondering if I’m ok. I think of me sitting in a park crying, not okay, and wishing she was there with me.
My friends call me excited and say they are almost there! I wipe my tears and go to meet them right when my mom gets through. I start crying on the phone and tell her everything is ok but I don’t want to cry so I cant talk. Then an amazing friend calls me and I cant talk to him either of Ill start crying. I hastily hang up, hug my friends that have arrived and take them to our hotel.
We find an amazing Italian restaurant and I order pesto pasta. We share a bottle of sweet red wine and we toast to a new life and to new friends. Things are looking up again.

san fransisco la union Quetzaltenango!

Hello everyone! I am sitting on my bed. Its Saturday and I have a free day!!! YAY- Right now I have some company. Galia is sitting on my bed with me and we both just ate saltines and nutella that I have hidden in my top dresser drawer…Thank you Kelly and Lisa. Galia loved it! Haha We had to scrape all the crumps off the bed though before don beto saw it..hehe
Anyway!!! I Know where I will be living for the next two years. Its interesting here. I feel like choosing to come to the peace corps I gave someone the ability to decide what the rest of my life is going to be like. On wedneday, the day we found out, I couldn’t help but think “the next three words that come out of this mans mouth are going to change my life forever.” And surely it will. I am going to San Fransisco la Union in the department of Quetzaltenango. I am very very excited. Quetzaltenango is definitely not one of the poorest departments in Guatemala but it does need help and I guess that’s why Im going. I am going to be working in a centro de salud with a doctor who knows Spanish, K’iche, Japanese and English! Ahhh My counterpart, the person I will be working with for the next two years is a woman and shes a tecnica in salud prventiva. I am not really sure what that means though because that’s technically what I am too. Well, that’s what I am supposed to tell them I am when they ask me! HAHA
For the last week I have had classes de K’iche in the mornings and classes for Spanish in the afternoon. The people in my site speak Spanish as a second language! Just like me! Haha And it is mostly the men who know a lot of Spanish. The women get less schooling and therefore primarily speak in K’iche. I will need to know some catch phrases to be able to build the confianza….trust. I know how to say good morning, xsaqarik. Good afternoon, xs’eq’ri and good night but I forgot how to spell it. Also thank you is matiox. I really like it so far!!! Im nervous and have a lot more to learn!
Some details, I will be living only 40 minutes away from the second biggest city in Guatemala….movie theaters, restaurants etc…Im assuming. And I am 30 minutes away from another volunteer named Ashley who I love! So that will be super fun. Emily is about 4 hours away from me though. She is living in Huehuetenango, One of the poorest departments. I will have electricity!!!!! I will have water but only during certain hours. I will also be living near a post office! But I have no clue if there’s an internet café around?? I hope so! This community has ever had a health volunteer. They had an agriculture volunteer 10 years ago. The major problems that face this community are malnutrition, gastrinol disease, ad respitory problems…This kind of scares me because I know nothing about the last two things!!! HAHA…I hope there’s some pregnant women around too…
On Tuesday I will be going to my site for a week and Im going to stay in the doctors house! He is supposed to help me find a house to rent with a family. And I am supposed to introduce myself to the mayor, firefighters, postman, and all the people in the municipality. There are no police in this community- we’ll see how that goes. Wish me luck! I have gotten so comfortable in my house with my family and it will be weird to leave my comfort zone again. Who knows what the bed is like, the shower, the bathroom, the food. The people!! Ahhhh!

This is me an our chonpipe.......Before we killed it. Little does he know in minutes his life will be taken...But we were super nice and we made it drink a whole cup of rum before we killed it. For 2 reasons....1) It would hurt him less when don beto chopped off his head and 2) It would make his meat taste better!! haha He was a delicious turkey. It was a weird day and I tried to be open minded about killing an aminal. It didnt bother me as much as i thought and I think its because of the respect they had for the turkey and It was their pet. They were very excited to teach me how to kill it to and they insist that when I go to my site and have my own chonpipes I am going to want to eat them....even though I swear I wont want to eat my pets! haha Anyway, so don beto chopped off its head, then we hung it upside down to drain...then we put it into a huge pot and poured boiling water on it and me and dona rosa plucked off its feathers...then we singed off the rest of its hairs over a fire and then we went to mass......I got sick from the smell....and then when we came home we opened it up and began to de gut it!! I got sick again from the smell and I told dona rosa it was the smell bothering me and she picked up the guts and smelled them and then said ¨they have no smell¨haha...Anyway Theres a littl epack in the turkeys belly that holds all its food before its digested and it was filled with full pieces of corn! really weird. Then the next morning we cooke dpepian with the turkey! It was amazing. I have the recipe and Im going to give it to you all and see who can make it! I have a picture of me smashing up some seeds on a rock in the kitchen...I love you all....I miss you all! I HELD A TURKEY! HEHEHEHEH (and in this picture behind me is our outdoor bathroom and shower)

my frist HIV-AIDS charla....VIH SIDA

Wow- sometimes life hits you right in the face….and this seems to happen much more often when you’re in the Peace Corps.

You really begin to know your limits and by that I mean you begin to realize you have no limits and it’s an amazing and terrifying experience.

No matter what country I’m living in I always roll out bed…I shower… I eat…I do what I’m supposed to do that day. No matter the circumstances sometimes just getting out of bed and having breakfast no matter what time it is, no matter what food you eat, no matter how freezing cold the shower is I am still doing the things I did everyday in the states. …..Its weird how far away from everything normal you are but you still have a routine.

Well today I had a moment where it was like someone pressed mute on the video of my life and I was able to simply observe. I was giving a charla in Spanish about HIV AIDS (VIH/SIDA) and I was being understood in this other language and I knew what I was saying! I had no idea this is what Id be doing in the peace corps. I really didn’t know what I was signing up for and now I’m standing in another country…striving and growing~ Its amazing.

There were about 70 kids, their teachers, and about 7 health promoters. We went to their school in a town close to ours and we gave them a charla about HIV AIDS. We had the gender and development group from peace corps (which I am going to join) train us how to give this charla….they showed us games to do etc….and then I found myself doing these games with the little kids! It was sooooo scary!!!! And sooo much fun! I had them get in a half circle and then I had 8 volunteers. One was a kid who signified a healthy human body and then three kids held hands around him and they wore signs that said globules blancos (white blood cells) and then we had three kids wearing signs that said “diarrhea” “parasito” y “gripe (common cold)” try to enter the body but the globules blancos fought them off….The kids acted this all out and had a ton of fun! But then this guy decided to have unprotected sex with a woman who had HIV…..then all the diseases were able to enter and the white blood cells died and then the kid wearing the human body sign had to wear a sign that said SIDA….It doesn’t sound that good written out but it was super fun and it’s an easy interactive way to really show what happens…We had a lot of other activities as well and the whole thing lasted a little longer than 2 hours! But all 4 of us shared the charla so it was less stressful.

Then we talked about blood to blood, mother to child, and unprotected sex and everything you could think of! We even talked about sex that includes, anal, oral and vaginal. These kids were about 13-16 and Believe me I never got the education they all got today in the states! We even demonstrated how to put a condom on a broom stick! Haha

And then it was time from question and answer…..and man did they have questions!!! Very very intelligent questions too. For a very conservative culture they really are un-conservative if that makes sense. To put it better, They are a very realistic culture. Anyway this one kid asked where they can buy safe condoms that wont break etc…and then a health promoter (older woman) got up and said they don’t need to be having sex….they shouldn’t be asking questions like that etc….and as we were all looking at one another to decide what we should say to her….another Guatemalan boy raised his hand and was like we are good kids and we simply want to be safe and have answers….It was amazing~ AMAZING….

Also, the best part was the one little girl who was wearing indigenous clothing (the others wore school uniforms.,.) she asked us what medicine is in birth control and we kind of half assed the answer because none of us are doctors….and I felt bad and like maybe she was scared to use birth control because she had heard bad things about it or something…so after the charla I walked up to her and her friends and I said “I want to clarify that birth control is not bad for you and It has chemicals that are already in your body they are simply in strong doses…” and then the girl and her 2 little friends leaned into me and said “Once a woman loses her virginity will everyone be able to tell?” I had them repeat the questions about three times to make sure I was hearing right before I said no very strongly….haha…I was like “no no no….no one will know unless you tell them.”
It broke my heart seriously to know that these girls were getting this information from their mothers in order to scare them into not having sex…..and then when they do decide to have sex they wont have any clue what a condom is or how to wear one etc….Its a very odd world here.

My friend Emily also talked to the three little girls later and they asked her the same question…They also asked is there’s a test to tell if someone is a virgin…and if a woman bleeds a lot. Young people are very smart and they are getting messages about sex from many different angles and Im glad we could clear up a few things for them because if a young girl began asking those questions to someone else she would be told it was inappropriate and she would never get the right answer and then she would go out and have sex anyways!

It was simply an amazing experience and I felt like maybe today I actually made a difference.
IM RIGHT WHERE I NEED TO BE.

pictures!!!

The top one is don beto, dona rosa and the cute neighboir boy giving vaccine eye drops to our turkeys and chickens!! It was soo hilarious! The next is me next to Anne Jr. A pine tree I planted at a little tiny rural school in quiche..where we had our field based training. There are more pictures of this on the way. The last picture is my house!!!! and its gorgeous! I love you all

This is Galia, 5 and her little brother Allen who is 1 year and 2 motnths!!! They are sooo cute and fun! They live attached to us. Don beto and Dona rosa are their grandparents. Aren´t they sooo cute! They are playing on my floor.